CruisingGay.com's Blog

August 27, 2009

About Gay Cruising – Keeping Safe Guide [rainbow-project.org]

Filed under: Gay Cruising — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — cruisinggay.com @ 1:17 pm

Cruising is a term used by men to describe the practice of sending and receiving verbal and non-verbal signals, which show that you are attracted to someone else. There are various methods of cruising ranging from subtle to extremely direct methods, and men “cruise” each other in various different places and settings i.e. street, saunas, bars, parks, internet etc. Cruising is just another way that men express their desire and attraction to each other. To many men there is a certain thrill or excitement attached to cruising but it can also potentially involve putting yourself in the way of harm. Therefore, it is important to minimise these risks and help avoid any danger to yourself or others.

 

In order to cruise safely here are some helpful tips:

1. When you arrive, have a good look around and identify possible escape routes in case of an emergency. It might also be worth visiting the area during the day to get a sense of space, routes, open and enclosed areas etc.

2. Try not to carry any valuables on your person such as wallet, jewellery or phone.

3. Bring condoms and lubricant with you if you intend on having sex – don’t assume the other person will have brought some. It might be a good idea to bring some anyway (just in case things go further than expected).

4. If cruising over the internet, avoid giving out personal information such as address, primary email address, telephone number etc.

5. Meet in a public place to begin with – you can then decide if you want to continue on with the relationship.

6. If sending a photo – avoid nude and explicit shots. Remember, these can be copied and distributed.

7. If posting a photo on your profile, avoid nude and explicit shots as anyone can access these.

8. If possible, tell a friend when you intend on going through a text, email or phone call.

9. If meeting for a drink, watch what you drink and stay in control. Avoid leaving your drink unattended because of the risk of your drink being spiked.

10. If cruising in a sauna, remember to keep hydrated, particularly if you’ve been drinking or taking drugs. Also, carry condoms and lubricant on your person by placing them under the strap on your keychain.

11. Never use Amyl nitrate or Butyl nitrate (poppers) with Viagra. Both work by opening blood vessels to allow greater blood flow and together, can cause heart failure (even in men who have no history of heart problems).

12. Remember that cruising should be fun and safe, if you feel unsure or think things are heading in a direction you don’t feel comfortable with – leave. You are under no obligation to do anything with anyone.

13. The Rainbow Project discourages you from any sexual behaviour in public places – whilst cruising itself isn’t illegal, having sex in public areas could lead to you being arrested and charged with a criminal offence.

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About Cruising [rainbow-project.org]

Filed under: Gay Cruising — Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , — cruisinggay.com @ 1:13 pm

Cruising

The Rainbow Project does not recommend cruising or cottaging due some elements of it which are illegal, and due to the dangers associated with attacks and unsafe sex. However if you decide to go for it keep these following tips in mind to ensure a safe and pleasant experience:

  • Bring plenty of condoms and lube and insist on safer sex; respect yourself and your health!
  • Be discreet when having sex. The more discreet you are the less chance there is of police activity or gay bashers.
  • Only go cruising when you are not too drunk or on drugs. You will need to be on your guard at all times
  • Leave your wallet and ID at home. Some attacks involve robbery and you do not want your identity to become known to your attacker.
  • Wear clothes and shoes you can run in and do not wear headphones.
  • Before you start checking out the men, check out the surroundings for exists and escape routes
  • Be aware that some gay basher might pretend to be gay. Trust your instincts!
  • Take any used condoms, wrappers etc. home with you. This kind of litter will draw complaints and police attention.

REMEMBER

Being at a cruising or cottaging area is not illegal, but having exposing yourself or having sex in public where someone could see you is without doing something unusual like looking peeking underneath a cubicle door or taking out the binoculars.

If you get arrested, stay calm, co-operate but only give your name and ask for a solicitor. The solicitor will advise you on your rights and what to say and is bound by client confidentiality.

If you get attacked remember that this is a crime, whether or not you were involved in something illegal. Report the attack to the local police station and ask to speak to the Minority Liaison Officer. Someone from The Rainbow Project can escort you if you prefer someone else there. If you are not sure about reporting the attack, come and speak to someone in Rainbow first to consider your options.

SAFER CRUISING ON THE INTERNET

When you are mentally healthy you feel good about yourself, enjoy relationships, learn confidently and overcome your difficulties. When you aren’t, you may feel overwhelmed by misery, anger or fear.

  • You do not know who you are talking to; in a chat room anyone can pretend to be anyone and any age.
  • Do not give out your home address or landline number or any other details until you have met the person and trust them.
  • When you arrange to meet up let someone know where you are going to be and arrange for them to contact you during the meeting and let the person you are meeting know you have made these arrangements.
  • Do not get too drunk; you need to stay on your guard and your performance now or later might not make the best impression.
  • You are under no obligation to have sex with the person you are meeting up with. If you decide to go ahead insist on safe sex and bring condoms and lube.
  • No chat room company will allow their staff to contact customers. If you are being blackmailed contact the Minority Liaison Officer at your local PSNI office.

SAFEST CRUISING

For the safest form of cruising visit a gay sauna. After paying an entrance fee you will be in a safe and clean environment with like-minded people and condoms and lube freely available and it is legal! Going to a gay sauna does not mean you have to have sex; some men go just for the company or just to relax and be themselves. Most saunas provide a service where you can make an appointment with a member of staff to show you around the facilities first if you are nervous about going.

August 9, 2009

Gay Cruising – an ill informed guide

Filed under: Gay Cruising — Tags: , , , — cruisinggay.com @ 2:08 pm

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